"How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie

September 8 2024

Such a strange, boring book. I don't often read self-help type books like this, so maybe that's just how they tend to be, but I read through the first section and a half before realizing I could just skim it (I got this from a library, so the important bits were already underlined by a previous compassionate reader) and not lose much. Carnegie illustrates his points with a prevalence of random stories that made me question their existence, especially when he spoke of renowned, respected people without mentioning their name (there was one instance he mentioned a doctor who had done some incredible study with irrefutable evidence about something, but didn't bother to say who the doctor was or what his methods were so readers could look into it themselves). I was expecting more psychology or science in general, I guess, or exercises offered so I could practically put things into practice. The advice Carnegie gives is so odd, too, and makes the book read like a narcissist's guide to human interaction: "Become genuinely interested in other people," "Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires," "Smile." The fuck? I also just didn't enjoy his writing style. He's one of those who goes "Let me say that again" and then rewrites something in italics FUCK that shit it makes me want to claw at my skin.

TLDR; I don't understand the hype. Here's a summary: praise people and get your head out of your ass. Could be good for customer service though. Writing about being genuine to get your way seems kinda disingenuous to me guys idk

"Lolita" by Vladimir Nabokov

October 2024

I think I'll start by saying I didn't enjoy this book - sometimes I even felt a small sense of dread before picking it up. I could occasionally commend the writing style (remember I'm a sucker for narrators that address the reader), but I fucking hated Humbert’s guts so much that the only thing that kept me going was the knowing that he was writing from prison. In terms of characterization, Nabokov did great by giving Humbert the self-aware, self-righteous meekness and pretentious simpleness predators have, but that doesn't mean I enjoyed focusing on him for 300 pages. When I was in the process of reading it, I could only really speak of the style when I told my friends about it, and one thing I found myself saying was that it was such a shame for such beautiful writing to be about such a disgusting story and state of mind. (I first consciously realized this on page 41: "It was the same child--the same frail, honey-hued shoulders, the same silky supple bare back, the same chestnut head of hair. A polka-dotted black kerchief tied around her chest hid from my aging ape eyes, but not from the gaze of young memory, the juvenile breasts I had fondled one immortal day. And, as if I were the fairy-tale nurse of some little princess (lost, kidnaped, discovered in gypsy rags through which her nakedness smiled at the king and his hounds), I recognized the tiny dark-brown mole on her side. With awe and delight (the king crying for joy, the trumpets blaring, the nurse drunk) I saw again her lovely in-drawn abdomen where my southbound mouth had briefly paused; and those puerile hips on which I had kissed the crenulated imprint left by the band of her shorts--that last mad immortal day behind the 'Roches Roses.' The twenty-five years I had lived since then, tapered to a palpitating point, and vanished.")

TLDR; all around a powerful depiction of a predator’s point of view, for better or worse.

"White Nights" by Fyodor Dostoevsky

September 8 2024

This was a pretty pleasant read! I loved Dostoevsky’s style and thought it was relatable and easy to get through, especially for a classic. The stories themselves were so simple, but I think they were so fun to read because of the way he went without the whole “show don’t tell” method and showed through telling; the characters are very upfront about how they feel or the habits they are aware of, and yet the way they describe themselves says so much about them. I personally related to White Nights (before the guy fell in love with a girl ten years younger than him) and felt comforted to know I wasn’t the only one with experience viewing the world from a distance and feeling so intimately connected to it because of that isolation. For some people, I think the odd way the two characters seemed to immediately feel bonded might not resonate, and I’m not sure I would’ve enjoyed the story as much if I hadn’t experienced a similar friendship in my own life. There were two other stories I can’t remember the name of... One was of two "roommates" who loved each other deeply (suspicious emoji), which I both adored and could’ve done without reading; Dostoevsky has a way of describing joy where it radiates onto you, and he had moments where addressed the reader directly which was endearing, but it made me realize Dostoevsky’s stories aren’t all that satisfying. I think the satisfaction comes in the midst of reading it, and you naturally feel dissatisfied once the process that afforded satisfaction ends. The last story, about a young boy who goes on a month-long stay at a family-friend’s mansion and learns what it’s like to have a crush, wasn’t my favorite. It was repetitive, but it did have a more satisfying ending. Maybe Dostoevsky’s stories are best served without dessert. I think I’ll definitely check out more of Dostoevsky’s work in the future, but the ones that seem the most interesting are over 400 pages and I don’t think I want to get into that right now. I’m still burned from The Last of the Mohicans.

TLDR; simple, pleasant, vibrant bottle episodes (but the location does change... not sure how else to describe it).

"The Last of the Mohicans" by James Fenimore Cooper

August 14 2024

I'm not going to lie, I was really entertained by the writing style at first. This book is from the 1800s and it shows in the language, and I was nervous to start reading it for this reason. Fortunately, it was really refreshing and entertaining in a way, and drew me in, because honestly you can't not pay close attention to the writing without feeling like you're having a stroke. Unfortunately, this did not last long. This book became a struggle to read too far in for my stubborn self to give up on but too early for me to walk away from it with positive feelings. The story was one that just kept falling forward on itself--this happened and then this happened and then this happened--and at no point did I have any idea what the 414 pages could possibly be filled with. I read this because it's why Pierce is called “Hawkeye” in MASH. Why did I put myself through this.

If you decide you want to read it for similarly shallow reasons, I would highly recommend speed-reading/skimming instead of working hard to understand everything. There's not really anything that develops, so you don't have to remember much from five chapters ago anyway. Every “surprise” plot development (there are like two) wasn't built up at all. Also there were so many names that started with M. I thought I was gonna go crazy. Mohicans, Mingoes, Maquas, Magua, Munro, Montcalm, Manitto... just to name a few.

TLDR; A grueling, unsatisfying read. But maybe I'm just not able to lock in like people in the 1800s with nothing better to do.

"The Ocean at the End of the Lane" by Neil Gaiman

June 27 2024

A very easy and quick read, but a lot more child-centric and magical than I had expected after reading the summary online. I probably would’ve loved this book as a preteen, and benefited from the little vague spiritual beats. As a twenty-year-old, though, I felt sort of silly reading it, but it was nice to be reminded of how I felt as a kid.

TLDR; An un-intimidating book to fill a whole day lazing around outside with instead of doom scrolling in bed, but adolescent, and the concepts weren’t anything I hadn’t seen before.

"Catch-22" by Joseph Heller

June 23 2024

The first good book I've read in a damn minute, and I wish that hadn’t been the case so my mind could have been primed for it. Heller’s style is both fluid and blundering and Jesus I love it. Slow moments turned out to be vital later on, and Heller rewards you the more details you remember. I wish I would have known just how many characters would be not only present but recurring so I would've done a better job keeping track of them; I'm sure this is a book that seems twice as good on a second read but I’m always averse to doing that. Maybe years from now I won't be.

TLDR; an entertaining and self-sufficient style and tone that was usually insanely confusing before clearing itself up, a masterclass in pacing. Just really well done and as satisfying as a book about the stupidity of war can be.

"I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream" by Harlan Ellison

May 2024

It was ite. Felt like it needed more... body horror? monologues? attention to detail? I'm usually a huge wuss when it comes to horror and this did not leave a scratch on me. It needed to work harder to give itself emotional weight and just doesn't have the pagecount to do so (Maybe it would've have more room if it didn't waste space with random misogyny. Yay 60s!). It needed more lines like "It took me ten months to say now" (the only line that really hit me) to connect the reader to a story that is otherwise so out there and unrelatable. A lot of missed opportunities to get a home run with the horror that I also see as plot holes, like the fact that the people could communicate with each other; why didn't Ellison lean into the themes of primal biology, or the evilness of AM, or the tolls the human mind takes when the body is worse for wear by taking away that luxury? Also why did only one guy have a weird ass name ToT I saw a lot of chances to really delve into the idea of dehumanization that Ellison just didn't follow through with despite the bones being there. The villainy of AM fell flat too, especially in the end. Ted paid the price for "saving" his friends, but he still believed his venture was a success; why did AM let him believe that, instead of manipulating Ted to believe he failed as a form of torture? AM is just not living up to those hundreds of millions of miles of circuits ingrained with hatred soz.

I got through a few of the other short stories in the collection too but they weren't anything to write home about.

TLDR; Hurray for positive messages about humanity kinda but the story is yelling at you from 100 feet away. The game is probably better.

"The Dream Master" by Roger Zelazny

April 8 2024

I lobe old science fiction, especially when you go far back enough that there are so many similarities in the material to right now. "The Dream Master" was engaging and thought-provoking at times, but it was difficult to tell what was important to the narrative. There were plenty of characters given more weight than they utilized for their role in the story. Sort of confusing too with the usage of these portions that had sudden perspective changes and no point-of-view at all -- I assumed they represented TV segments? But this book would make a bomb ass movie if someone could master those transitions. A lot of pretentious dialogue because the characters are pretentious, and a lot of old myth references that probably added a lot to the story when you knew what they alluded to (I did not). With all that being said, the more you connect the side plots to the main issue, the more you are rewarded and can fill in the blanks of the storyline progression. I found out about this book from a random YouTube video recommendation, and the guy said he reread it to fully understand and enjoy it, but I don't feel so inclined.

TLDR; interesting but sort of condescending, needs a banger movie adaptation.

"Frankenstein" by Mary Shelley

March 1, 2024

I did not like this book. It made me feel anxious and on-edge without any payoff. I did not get any sort of message except "don't play God" but I was Not planning on doing that so I'm upset that I wasted my time feeling like shit and reading a meandery story where most of it is meticulous descriptions of where the main character is.

TLDR; oh come on my summary wasn't that long.

"Perfume" by Patrick Suskind

February 2024

I think this book would've been better if it were shorter, not for the sake of patience but potency. I was intrigued in the first half just from the way scent and the act of perceiving it is described, and the story as a whole made me consider all the things humans perceive but neglect to acknowledge when making split second judgements, but besides that the story is so incredibly drawn out. Also pedophilic in multiple instances, which I wasn't prepared for. The writing wasn't very romantic, which could be a natural result of translation, so combined with a tedious storyline it tended to drag. I loved being hit by strong narrative beats, like the descriptions of the demise of those who were ever remotely close to Grenouille, and I think the book would've been more charming if it leaned into its bluntness. Overall it didn't win me over, but I appreciated the change in perspective it gave me.

TLDR; wrap it up white boy.

"The Last Unicorn" by Peter S. Beagle

February 2024

I have three books that have made me appreciate their movie adaptation: "Lord of the Rings, in which the movies turned meander-y storyline into an epic, "Howl's Moving Castle," which filled in those plotholes Ghibli movies tend to have while making me love the characters even more, and "The Last Unicorn." The latter's movie is such a faithful adaptation that lines of dialogue in the book played out exactly as I had heard them when I was 5 years old in the backseat of my Dad's car with a portable DVD player propped on the center armrest. The book overall was not a difficult read, which I was grateful for having it be the first book (for pleasure) I picked up in a hot minute, but was thoughtful and had personality. This personality is one of the things that also wavered my opinion of it -- it was self-aware, and so it was more difficult for me to put my finger on what the overall message was. I had to speak about it out loud to find my thoughts about it. Now I think I can say it is something about hope, or identity, or mortality, or all three, but it also seems to indulge in its moral gray area/confusion. The characters' fates are more or less bound given their world and positions, and they manage to exhibit autonomy in ways both unconscious and conscious, whether they know their unwritten fate and decide to play along, or they make an unexplained decision that alters the narrative.

As in any book-to-film adaptation, we tend to learn more about the characters through the book, but I was delighted/surprised to find out that we learn the most about Schmendrick! He was an incredibly interesting character and depiction of earned cynicism, yet he was still decent and clever. His characterization was incredibly human and I felt that he should've been regarded as the main character.

Overall, I enjoyed this book. It was not a chore to get through. It made me laugh and then slapped me in the face with gospel disguised as dialogue. I also got it from my university's library, so the pages were soft with age and the cover was cloth and the inside ticket thing was stamped with a date as early as 1950, and anyway I think that added to the overall experience. The fact that my bewilderment stays with me after finishing it makes me feel like those who saw unicorns in the story, and maybe the lack of coherence and autonomy is a reflection of life from an immortal perspective -- I guess I can move beyond frustration to appreciate the possibilities.

TLDR; surprisingly modern and subversive yet classic and unexacting, emotional and entertaining, I like!